July's Tip on the Mysteries of Male/Female Communication is about giving you ways to send a clear signal to all those Cowboys and Cowgirls you will encounter over the next 10 days. Dr. Monica Moore conducted a study to see exactly what women were doing who were successful in approaching men. She observed more than 200 women at a party and recorded these "nonverbal solicitation signals". The top moves that make a man come over and talk to you at a party are listed below. Guys you will find these tips interesting too so feel free to borrow some of them to try out!
1) Smile at him broadly
2) Throw him a short, darting glance
3) Look straight at him and flip your hair
4) Keep a fixed gaze on him
5) Look at him, toss your head, then look back
6) "Accidentally" brush up against him
7) Nod your head at him
8) Point to a chair and invite him to sit
9) Tilt your head and touch your exposed neck
10) Lick your lips during eye contact
11) Parade close to him with exaggerated hip movement
12) Ask for his help with something
13) And the final one Dr. Moore observed but didn't advise was "pat his buttocks" hehe - I'll let you decide.
Just for fun and since it is flirting season, I am going to mention the Stampede "Art of Attraction" Bootcamp happening July 13th - 15th which is being presented by the company, 'Man Meets Woman'. It's primarily a workshop for men but women are welcome too. The website is www.manmeetswoman.com and if you decide to sign on up, please let them know you heard it here first. :)
As a Date Coach, here's a friendly reminder of my website, www.yourdatecoach.com. Please feel free to contact me any time to discuss how date coaching can help you or someone you know turn their love life right around.
Enjoy our July issue and do tell if you have any requests for topics you would like to see in future editions. You are also welcome to view our archived newsletter by clicking at the bottom of this newsletter.
We are now celebrating over 50 marriages through our service!
"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." ~ Mark Twain
Look forward to seeing you soon!
Sincerely,
Dear Christine,
I'm an attractive, smart, fun 37 year old woman (although I look 28-29).
I seem to keep attracting men who are in transition phases (want to see me but not ready for a relationship, on the rebound, or playing by "The Code" etc.), and often I don't find out until I'm feeling attached (its not that I don't try to find out). Then when things don't work out, I'm hurt. I'm now finding myself very guarded and vulnerable.
What can I do to get myself past this, and to change the men I'm attracting/attracted to?
SR
Dear SR,
Feeling guarded and vulnerable is not an area you want to spend much time in. It can feel really limiting. There is a simple rule, when you change yourself, you can change who you are attracting. It's not to say that "transition" men will not still approach you but you will be able to pick up on the cues as though they had a billboard over their head. I'm going to guess that sometimes these men are sending signals but you are choosing to ignore them. A woman's strong instinct does not allow her to have things go completely over her head so be conscious of cues and tune in more to your instincts. Don't let yourself have thoughts like, "well this behaviour is kind of like the last transition guy but it's different so I'm going to hang in there to see if things change". Your new self-language will be "well this behaviour is kind of like the last transition guy and that is not what I'm looking for and that is not what I deserve so I'm going to stop dating him so that I am free to meet a non-transition guy".
Instead of feeling guarded and vulnerable, allow yourself to feel empowered that you now have a really strong "transition guy radar" and are now quick to use the exit door.
Eventually transition men will not enter your life because you simply value yourself on a different level. People always enter our lives to teach us something.
I think you can remove me from your mailing list. My one time adventure with Six Minute Dates was a success! The guy I met, Rob VanStaden, will be my soon Husband as we are getting married this July.
Speed-Dating at Coffee Junkies: (licensed) 795-1st Ave SW
Guests can be (+/-) 3 years of any of our age ranges.
Wednesday, July 18th - ages 30-40
Thursday, July 19th - ages 25-35
Wednesday, July 25th - ages 35-45
Thursday, August 2nd - ages 40-50
Thursday, August 9th - ages 25-35
Thursday, August 16th - ages 30-40
Wednesday, August 29th - ages 35-45
JULY 2007
Aries - This month, it's time for you to slow down when it comes to romance. Before you launch into a new adventure, take a look at ways in which you might be undermining yourself romantically. Do you go into things thinking 'this will never work'? Do you judge people too soon? Not soon enough? Are you comfortable with yourself? These are all things that shape relationships from the get-go, so on the 1st, give them a little thought. An insight you have on the 3rd will help you understand a frustrating development that occurs on the 4th or 5th. By the 6th and 7th, though, you've had a real breakthrough, and there's romance aplenty on your plate. Dig in! The 15th and 16th are great days for romance -- and the more creative you get, the better they are. By the 20th, you see that it's time to let go of some selfishness that's been slowing you down in your romantic pursuits, and by the 24th and 25th, you're exploring whole new ways of being. On the 29th and 30th, get ready for a few more insights. If you find a tiny romantic obstacle standing in your way on the 31st, don't let it get you down.
Taurus - You start the month, on the 1st, with your two feet planted firmly on the ground (when it comes to love and romance, that is). Yes, your head may be in the clouds, what with this dazzling new person in your life, but you know just where you stand, both with yourself and with them. What a great feeling! On the 5th, it's high time you talked to your friends about whatever's going on in your love life. And doing so paves the way for a couple of fantastic days that light up your romantic world on the 8th and 9th. On the 15th and 16th, the object of your romantic affection could form an alliance that makes you nervous. Keep your feet on terra firma as you consider whether your fears are founded or not. Everybody gets a little nervous when their feelings are involved, after all. On the 21st, take your love interest to a museum. Or make them take you. If you want to smooch when you reach the classical Greek sculptures, go ahead. On the 25th and 26th, be a little bit careful: When it comes to romance, you don't want to gild the lily. On the 30th, something might rub you the wrong way. Talk to your friends about it on the 31st.
Gemini - What's on your mind on the 1st? Do you feel like somebody has a hidden agenda when it comes to romance? Do you feel like they're asking you out while they really need to work out some issues left over from an old relationship? Or is it you who's trying to work out past problems on your current potential partner? Usually when people do this, they're not aware of their actions. So take a long, hard look at the situation before you commit. The 4th, 5th and 6th may not be the best days to communicate whatever you're thinking, however; these days are rife with the potential for misunderstandings. Hang in there, though, because the 10th and 11th are full of clarity. You really connect with someone, and all of those things you were worried about seem a lot less manifest than they did at the beginning of the month. On the 15th and 16th, you could get into a real debate. By the 20th and 21st, you're having a lot of fun with all of this romance stuff. On the 25th and 26th, you might be considering whether or not you want to take all of this to a deeper level. What does that mean to you? What does that mean for them? End the month, on the 31st, thinking about change. But don't talk about it yet
Cancer - This could be the month when you finally sit down and start dealing with something that's been affecting your ability to get romantic. Maybe it's some pain from the past. Maybe it's some fear of the future. Whatever it is, it's holding you back, and it's something only you can fix. Take advantage of the summer weather: Get outside and go for a long walk after you've sat for a while. Sometimes nature and physical movement can help us understand ourselves better than anything else. By the 4th and 5th, you notice you have a lot of good romantic energy flowing. You're ready to explore the unknown, and your intuition is on target. Well, what do you expect? On the 10th and 11th, you might be a little bit irritable -- well, change is never easy. By the 12th, 13th and 14th, your emotions have righted themselves, and you're a virtual bull's-eye for romantic arrows. And who is that cute archer? On the 19th, 20th and 21st, you and your potential romantic other half may have very different ideas about what love and romance should consist of. Talk about it, but tread carefully. On the 25th and 26th, do something good for yourself. On the 31st, you end the month with some seriously good energy.
Leo - It looks like a relationship issue could come up for you on the 2nd or 3rd. Nope, you don't even have to be in a romantic relationship for a relationship issue to come up. Sure, that seems like a drag -- until you realize what it means, which is that all human connections are both deep and problematic. And in your particular case it could mean that a friendship is on the verge of turning into a romance. This could size up to be quite an exciting month! By the 8th and 9th, your stubbornness, while absolutely essential to your irresistible charm, could pose a problem in the short run. For example, if you absolutely refuse to compromise with the object of your affections, they might get mad. Do your best. The 14th, 15th and 16th are fiery, fantastic, frisky and funny days. You and your love interest are having a ball. By the 21st, everybody thinks you two are the best couple at the disco, so it's time to hit the dance floor! On the 25th and 26th, it looks like there's romance, romance, romance for the two of you. Be sure you enjoy it, since these are very special days, when you're really building something. On the 31st, if emotional sparks fly, don't freak out -- when there's a lot of chemistry, there are bound to be a few explosions.
Virgo - This looks to be a mighty romantic month for you, Sweetpea. Have you been waiting for some honeybee to come along and pollinate those romance plants in your romance garden? Well, on the 1st, the sun is shining and the bees are buzzing. And while you're out there watering your garden, a romance honeybee is more than likely to pay you a visit. Make sure you have the Earth well tilled and fertilized, and you could grow a great, big romance bush by the time the month is over. There may even be great, big sweet-smelling romance blossoms that are bound to bear fruit before fall. On the 5th, be careful not to overwater that romance bush, and don't kill it with criticism. Romance is a fragile flower, after all. By the 10th and 11th, it's time for a serious conversation with your honeybee. Do you want to ask them to stop buzzing the other bushes? By the 17th and 18th, things are growing wonderfully. On the 22nd and 23rd, exercise your intellectual curiosity when it comes to love. You could find out something new. On the 28th, put on your best gardening gloves -- there's serious romance in the air tonight. On the 31st, wrap up the month with a little weeding. It never hurts!
Libra - On the 1st, you could be feeling a little bit down. The sun is up, but your romantic energy is low. What's the best way to counter this? Get out into the sunlight and let its healing rays work their slow, steady magic. Before you know it you're revived and renewed. As soon as the 2nd and 3rd, you're ready for romance. And it sure looks like romance is going to be knocking on your door. By the 7th, you may have moved from romance to relationship, which could mean it's time for a relationship talk. Well, sometimes you need to define the terms, don't you? On the 13th, you feel totally emotional. Go for a nice long jog, then you can start to process your feelings. On the 18th, the logistics of it all could overwhelm you. Are you on one continent while your love interest is on another? Or does it just feel that way? By the 20th and 21st, you two have figured something out. It feels good. You might want to go faster than they want to go on the 26th. Give them time. By the 31st, you're ready to wrap up the month with a whole new approach: Try just accepting them for who they are.
Scorpio - You've heard it before, but on the 1st of the month, you're going to hear it again: If you don't communicate what you want and what you need, you're probably not going to get it. So ... tell them, tell them, tell them. Then tell them again. Then, if they still don't get it, it's time to move on. But you could be surprised at just how effective a little communication can be. So try it out, this month. By the 5th you're in a whole new romantic sphere. It's called getting what you want and feeling good about it. And it's one of the best spheres out there! On the 9th, it's time to try out yet another strategy: compromise. Yes, next to communication, compromise could be one of the most important components of a healthy, successful romance. On the 15th and 16th, if you want to do something flamboyant, like send them a dozen giant sunflowers at work, think twice. If it still seems like a good idea the second time around, go ahead and do it. The 22nd and 23rd are thrilling days. Your romance is sunnier than those dozen sunflowers, and is growing twice as fast. By the 28th, you're getting along well with everybody. Could it be you're feeling pretty great about all of this romance?
Sagittarius - If you're feeling like your finances are a little tight on the 1st, don't forget that real romance doesn't require a lot of money. All it takes to spark a fire is two twigs, after all -- and a little imagination. A moonlit night at the beach doesn't hurt either (and it's free). So give your imagination free reign this month, even if you have to watch your pocketbook. The 6th and 7th are pretty big romance days. Whether you two are playing capture the flag and find a hiding place in the same little nook next to a babbling stream, or you bump into them and both of you spill your cappuccinos, you two are bound to find each other this month. On the 13th, your energy and your love interest's could be mismatched, but don't let that get you down. If you're meant to be, you're meant to be. On the 17th and 18th, your mind is on anything but romance as things get nuts around your workplace, but by the 21st, you're ready to think about love again. On the 24th, 25th and 26th, you're the walking, talking proof that money can't buy love. Why? Because without spending a single penny, you're the richest person on Earth (when it comes to romance, of course). On the 31st, wrap up the month with some serious thoughtfulness.
Capricorn - On the 1st, your month gets off to an extraordinarily romantic start. It's almost as if Cupid has decided to be your best friend. His little arrows are all on target, and his targets are all the right ones. Be sure to take advantage of all this good luck -- and get this person's number, for goodness sakes! On the 5th, write a poem. It doesn't have to rhyme, as long as it expresses your true emotions. On the 10th and 11th, you need to communicate what's in your heart, whether you do it over email, on the phone or in person. If they're demanding too much too soon on the 15th, do them the favor of letting them know. After all, it's not nice to withhold your responses to romantic situations. On the 20th and 21st, do something cultural. The museum can be totally romantic, you know, as can an art-house cinema or a picnic at the sculpture garden. On the 27th and 28th, whatever you want is yours, basically. That little Cupid is at your beck and call, and so is the object of your affection. Wrap up the month, on the 31st, with yet another poem. Oh, heck, you can compose prose, too, if you'd rather.
Aquarius - If, on the 1st, you just don't feel all that darned romantic, don't stress out. There are romantic days and less romantic days in life, just like there are frantic days and less frantic days at the office. Go with the flow, Honey, and you'll be just fine. In fact, you could be in a very romantic mood as early as the 2nd and 3rd, when you're a veritable romance magnet. Get some rest on the 8th, and by the 10th and 11th, you're oh-so-ready for the hot affair that's coming your way. Just be careful not to get burned! On the 15th and 16th, you may have to compromise. But, you know, compromise isn't always so difficult -- sometimes it even makes you feel better! On the 21st, you connect with somebody on a very mind-body level, and on the 25th, you get reconnected in a whole new way all over again. On the 29th and 30th, get ready: If you're graduating from stand-up comedian school, you're going to get a huge round of applause and attract the attention of more than one romantic admirer. If you spend the day at the office, prepare yourself for more or less the same thing. Yes, there's a lot of romance heading your way!
Pisces - You've never had a problem with being set up on a date. After all, you figure that if you know somebody and somebody they know seems like they might be interesting, you're ready to go out to dinner and give them a chance. After all, it doesn't mean you have to tie the knot -- it's just a good way to get to know people who could turn out to be potential romantic partners. On the 1st, one of your friends with excellent taste is going to be working behind the scenes to set you up with someone who could be very interesting. The very romantic 4th and 5th are good days to explore some of these blind date possibilities. By the 11th, you could be a little bit tired of it all. That's not to say that you didn't like them -- it just means there's a lot of new information to process. Give yourself a break. On the 15th and 16th, focus on yourself. Get to the gym, eat right, get a lot of sleep. That's the best way to ensure you do the best you can when a relationship issue comes up on the 18th. On the 23rd, watch out: Somebody may be less charming than they seem. On the 27th and 28th, you could get a little more help from your friends. You end the month, on the 31st, with some seriously excellent romance. Great! You deserve it.
Love Horoscopes are courtesy of www.love.astrology.com
July's Tip on the Mysteries of Male/Female Communication is about giving you ways to send a clear signal to all those Cowboys and Cowgirls you will encounter over the next 10 days. Dr. Monica Moore conducted a study to see exactly what women were doing who were successful in approaching men. She observed more than 200 women at a party and recorded these "nonverbal solicitation signals". The top moves that make a man come over and talk to you at a party are listed below. Guys you will find these tips interesting too so feel free to borrow some of them to try out!
Dear Christine,
JULY 2007
