I've had many conversations with different people over the last few weeks about being single and I'd like to share one common phrase I hear, "I almost feel guilty about wanting to find a partner". There's a shared sense from so many singles that since they have full lives with lots of friends, activities, a good job, good health, a nice home, they don't understand why they also feel such a strong need to connect with someone special. The truth is, the desire to connect with someone special is right up there with oxygen and food - it is a very basic human need. I guess if you were able to control your need for oxygen and food, then you would be able to control your desire to connect with someone special. This is the way we humans are wired and it's a good thing.
"Great love happens in the blink of an eye. One moment you're enjoying your life, and the next you're wondering how you ever lived without them."
-Will Smith "Hitch"
Our Spring Fling parties were a great success with tons of matches! Our next large-scale parties will be in early Fall.
Just like hiring a fitness trainer, hiring a Dating Coach can help you make big changes. Click on 'Hire a Dating Coach' from our homepage. Feel free to contact me to find out more and how I can help you turn around your love life!
Enjoy our June issue and do tell if you have any requests for topics you would like to see in future editions.
"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." ~ Mark Twain
Look forward to seeing you soon!
Sincerely,
Dear Christine,
I met a guy through work and we seemed to really hit it off. So far we have gone for "business" lunches that last for around 2hrs because we both seem to lose track of time! I have made some pretty obvious suggestions that we should see each other outside of work, and he has too.. but he doesnt ask. I tried to ask him out, and he said that he had other plans. Am I just wasting my time with this guy, or should I be patient and let him make the next move?
Dating Challenged & Frustrated
Dear Dating Challenged & Frustrated,
I can see why you are frustrated. You are receiving a lot of mixed messages from this guy. In order to make a decision, focus on what he DOES rather than what he says. His score is low in the "Does Department" right now because, 1) He has not asked you out despite suggestions you've made, 2) When you asked him out, he said he had other plans BUT did not suggest an alternate time. He says he would like to see you outside of work but, until he asks you, you should put him aside. In the future, keep your business meetings short (no more 2 hour ones!) and schedule something that makes you feel good afterwards, "Hi Mr. Mixed Messages, I can only meet for an hour today because I'm meeting my friend at the gym". Because of the way men are wired, if you are too available, they lose interest. Allow him to make the first move and in the meantime, keep your options open.
Wednesday, June 14th- ages 30-40
Thursday, June 15th - ages 25-35
Wednesday, June 28th - ages 25-35
Thursday, June 29th - ages 35-45
JUNE 2006
Aries - As the month starts on the 1st, a flirtation you've been engaging in is moving ahead with a momentum all its own. What can you do, you ask? Take control, that's what! It's time to step in and step up to the challenge of love. That's right, play 'love ball' this month, and you won't strike out. On the 5th and 6th, don't push them too hard, and on the 10th and 11th, your frankness, honesty and 'what you see is what you get' quality are going to impress them. On the 15th, whatever is holding them back (old issues? A messy breakup? Fear? Longing coupled with fear?) becomes clearer to you. You still want them on your team, so it's time for a recruitment strategy. How about chocolate? On the 19th and 20th, it looks like you've made your play -- and played it well. That's no real surprise, though. You're not the team-of-love captain for nothing, you know! On the 25th and 26th, things get deep and may get even deeper. Great. By the 30th, it looks like you're on your way to a season record.
Taurus - So you've been watching each other across the donut counter for weeks now. You say 'sprinkles' and they say 'yes.' You say 'sugar' and they say 'yes.' You say 'to go' and they say 'of course.' On the 1st, it's time to take it further. Just a few more words will do the trick. Instead of 'sprinkles,' say 'Would you like to go ... ' then -- this is the tricky part -- say ' ... on a date, sugar?' What will they say? If the answer is 'no,' don't worry. By the 6th, you're meeting so many new potential sweeties (and sprinkles and coconut flakes) that you may forget your donut-shop love. On the 11th, you take a look at the serious side of all this flirty stuff. What does it mean to connect with another person? By the 17th, a sweet feeling of self-acceptance will double-frost your days. If you need a break from all of this sugar, go ahead and do a love fast (you know what that means: no flirting) on the 19th. On the 24th, you say what you need to say. On the 29th, do what you need to do, sweetie
Gemini - Everybody knows that being too goal-oriented isn't a good idea when it comes to love. What not everybody knows is that sometimes somebody has to be a little goal-oriented to get things off the ground. So, on the 1st, if you've had your eye on a prize but nothing has happened, get motivated. Drop a few hints. Show up at their desk every so often. That kind of thing. By the 3rd and 4th, tone down your messages and see if they take the bait. If they don't, maybe they aren't ambitious enough for you, you know? On the 9th, your penchant for straight talk comes to the fore. And sometimes, in romance, straight talk is exactly what's required. On the 11th, take a break. If you step back and look around, you could be surprised to see who's pursuing you, especially on the 16th and 17th. Wow! On the 23rd and 24th, a bright new beginning (with kisses) is on your horizon, and by the 30th, you reach a romantic turning point.
Cancer - On the 1st, you might find yourself saying, 'Hey, love isn't easy!' No, sugar, it isn't easy. But really, would you want it to be? Wouldn't that take all the challenge out of it? And wouldn't that make it, well ... boring? At the very least, too predictable? You don't want your love life to function in alphabetical order like your Rolodex, after all. Or in numerical order like your Excel sheets. Or by color code, like your files. Try to enjoy the unknown on the 5th and 6th, and then try to embrace the object of your affection (if an opportunity arises) on the 8th and 9th. On the 11th, get connected (yes, your Rolodex could come in handy) and on the 17th, take a step back and see if you've learned anything this month. On the 21st, you see a problem. However, you're in such a good space on the 25th and 26th that you feel like you've never met a problem you couldn't solve with a little romance. By the 30th, you might just be proven right.
Leo - Well, if the month isn't starting out with a great big romantic bang for you! On the 1st, look for something big, bright and beautiful to burst onto your romantic scene. About time, you say! Oh, you! You have plenty of admirers -- some of them are just too starstruck to tell you how they feel. This bright light of a person who wants your phone number is anything but shy, though. Look for some major romantic progress on the 3rd and 4th, then again (with a little push from you) on the 7th, 8th and 9th. On The 12th and 13th, you could be reminded of just how important communication is (especially if you lose their number). Then, on the 17th, try to get a feel for the situation. What's going on here, anyhow? The 23rd and 24th are good days to share how you feel electronically. (Maybe you should send them a digital photo, with the help of some photo editing. How about you and this person next to the Eiffel Tower, with 'I Love Paris Almost as Much as I Heart You' across your t-shirts? Just a thought.) On the 28th and 29th, you get some positive feedback.
Virgo - You're enthusiastic, and your good attitude is catching. There's somebody who's going to be taken with it -- and you -- on the 1st. What will happen with this spark this month? It depends on both of you. On the 3rd and 4th, keep on the lookout for a few warm intentions -- you're drawing admirers like (love struck) moths to a flame. On the 9th, you might offer a prospective love a helpful 'strategy for approaching me.' This is very thoughtful (and smart) of you! On the 13th, you see if they've started implementing your suggested 'one, two, three and get to know me' plan. On the 17th, get in tune with nature and let your love object do their thing, whatever that is. By the 21st, you can take the time to reflect on your romantic experiences so far this month. If you see a quick fix to a little love-related problem on the 26th, grab it. On the 30th, you shine. But then, you usually do.
Libra - On the 1st, you're very likely to attract some romantic interest in the course of a performance. Whether you're on stage crooning or speaking during an office-wide meeting, your eloquence and elegance are bound to spark a flame in at least one chest. On the 5th and 6th, you could smell that cinnamon and marshmallow scent that always signals a new beginning. Okay, maybe your own 'new beginning' scent is more like cherry blossoms. Or chlorine and sunshine. Or wood cleaner, or carrot juice. Anyway, you'll know it when you smell it. On the 10th and 11th, things are remarkably smooth. You're flirty, you're laughing and you're making eye contact -- you go! On the 16th and 17th, get their number if you don't have it yet, and on the 21st, make a move -- any move. On the 26th, you see how romantically relaxing it can be to just let go, and on the 30th, identify the problem before you try to solve it.
Scorpio - On the 1st, you have two options when it comes to romance. One is to tense up, freak out and then just walk away before things get scary. The other is to take a deep breath, recognize that you have some fear, breathe in and out again and take a step forward. The kind of month you have depends on which you choose, so think it through. On the 4th, an internal block becomes clearer to you, and this opens up some energy on the evening of the 7th. This energy keeps flowing, big time, through the very romantic 8th and 9th. On the 13th, energy may free up again -- especially if you make some peace with things as they are, rather than pretend they are the way you think they should be. On the 17th, take control (now this is something you're really good at!). On the 23rd and 24th, your key word is: communicate. By the 30th, you've really learned something for the future.
Sagittarius - You're in a relatively receptive space on the 1st. You're enjoying the almost-summertime atmosphere, but you aren't losing your head. Instead, you're thinking about what it might be like to lose your heart. Is a heart, you wonder, as easy to retrieve as a pair of goggles, or a set of swim fins? Probably not. And where is the lost and found, anyway? You have a pretty good idea of which good-looking lifeguard to ask. On the 3rd or 4th, a run-in with this cutie (who's well-versed in first aid) makes you feel more in love than ever. And did they have an 'I'd like to resuscitate you' look in their eye? Could be -- you find out more on the 9th. The 10th and 11th are bonanza days, full of new beginnings. Did you sign up for the lifeguard training class? Very clever! Make your move on the 16th or 17th, even if you're wearing silly-looking swim fins. On the 21st, stay up late and enjoy the longest day of the year. Ride things out on the 26th. By the 30th, you're at a whole new flip-turning point.
Capricorn - If, come the 1st, you feel like you're just not sure where you stand romantically, why not shake it up? Move! Jump! Tap dance! If you do, you may feel a little bit clearer about where you are, and who you are, and who is generating all this uncertainty and excitement. If you don't, you'll at least feel a little looser and more relaxed after all that exercise. By the 5th and 6th, you reach a turning point, when something shifts romantically. On the 10th and 11th, the philosophical side of life (and love) come to your attention, and it's great preparation for some lucid, lovey-dovey days the 12th and 13th. By the 17th, you give of yourself really and truly, and on the 19th, you ask someone else for a little something in return. This person likes giving it to you, and by the 21st, you have a real give-and-take going on. On the 26th, you relax. Take a look at where you're on the 30th. Then jump up and down and do a little 'romance dance!'
Aquarius - On the 1st, you're in an enviable romantic space. That is, for the moment, there is absolutely nothing you can do. This forces you to step back and take a look at things as they stand with a calm, clear eye. You might not find it half bad. Even if the person you'd like to love you doesn't yet, maybe you'll be able to appreciate just how great they are. Think about it, anyway. On the 5th and 6th, go ahead and approach them, but go slowly. On the 10th and 11th, separate the wheat from the chaff, as far as your romantic approach goes. Your new, less-problematic romantic moves should really get a response on the 14th and 15th. Wow! On the 20th, things go well during the day -- why not call this person during your lunch hour? On the 25th, attend to the details, and by the 30th, you may be impressed by what romance has shown you this month.
Pisces - The 1st is a good day to make connections. Whether you go out and meet new people or stay home and call old friends (and maybe an old flame or two), any contact will do you good. It could also encourage some romantic vibes. By the 5th and 6th, you might find yourself smack in the middle of an unexpected romantic situation. Sit tight and let it develop before you take action. On the 10th and 11th, you let go of an old hurt, and it does your imagination a world of good. On the 15th, you go internal. You come back up for air (and find a little bit of romance) by the magical 16th and 17th. On the 23rd and 24th, keep pushing. What happens now will be important for a long time to come. On the 29th, express your feelings with a little (or a lot of) creative energy.
Love Horoscopes are courtesy of www.love.astrology.com
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I've had many conversations with different people over the last few weeks about being single and I'd like to share one common phrase I hear, "I almost feel guilty about wanting to find a partner". There's a shared sense from so many singles that since they have full lives with lots of friends, activities, a good job, good health, a nice home, they don't understand why they also feel such a strong need to connect with someone special. The truth is, the desire to connect with someone special is right up there with oxygen and food - it is a very basic human need. I guess if you were able to control your need for oxygen and food, then you would be able to control your desire to connect with someone special. This is the way we humans are wired and it's a good thing.
Hi Christine,
JUNE 2006
